Fear

My daughter is eight. She loves to sing. Always has. She not only sings in the shower but as she’s doing schoolwork. I’ve even heard her sing in her sleep. She has a good voice, powerful. She can be upstairs in her room, I can hear her throughout the house belting out some song. It’s a gift.

She knows she can sing. Not in a proud way, just she knows. She doesn’t question that as I often question if I can write. This is her first year to take voice lessons. At first she was nervous, but she loves her teacher, loves to sing. It’s a perfect combination. For the last three or four years, she has said she wanted to be a singer, that God wanted her to sing. But now she has this fear of getting in front of others to sing. It’s natural. It’s also an age thing. But it’s ultimately a battle. If the Evil One can convince her the fear is HUGE and insurmountable, then he’s won a battle.

If the Evil One can get any of us to not use a gift that God has given us, then he feels victorious. It’s a temporary victory, but a victory nonetheless. Are you giving the Evil One power over you? Are you crumbling before gigantic fears?

I see so many writers doing this. I certainly have. I’ve questioned why I’m writing. I’ve wanted to quit in a fit of rage or frustration or depression. But if we feel called to this writing life, to whatever gifts God has given us, then shouldn’t we fight the battle of fear. Fear is not of the Lord.

Over the last few months, I’ve had to face many fears in this writing life, having to do things that I am not necessarily comfortable doing, like speaking, being in a video, traveling, etc… Fear. It’s disabling. Can it also be disobedient to what God has called me to do? I’ve had to make a practice of recognizing fear when it springs up before me, and I’ve had to remind myself that fear is not of the Lord.

My daughter has seen this. I’ve been very open with my kids about my fears, about having to do things that are way out of my comfort zone in order to be obedient to the Lord. I hope she’s learning. Because my daughter loves to sing. She loves to perform. But she has this fear…

What about you?

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