For many, many years, I didn’t believe in myself. I still struggle with that. So writing has been a journey of self-discovery and growth as I have gained confidence in my abilities and gifts. I don’t mean I’m proud or haughty about it, at least I hope not. But I do think we all have gifts and talents and abilities and should have confidence to use those. But for many, many years, I didn’t have any confidence. I was shy. It wasn’t publishing my first or nineteenth book that gave me confidence. No, confidence was hard won through lots of work and climbing that mountain of self-doubt. Taking the risk that I might fail or embarrass myself gave me confidence in knowing if I did embarrass myself it wasn’t the worst thing ever. If I did fail, then I could dust off and get back on my feet and try again or try something else. Failing wasn’t the worst-case scenario either. NOT trying, NOT risking was much, much worse.
Joining my first critique group was frightening. Reading aloud a chapter I’d written to other wannabe writers was a huge step. Each time I did it, I overcame another fear. Hearing the things that needed to be fixed, I learned things about my writing and gained confidence to try again.
Then this shy person had to start speaking to groups. I battled a whole bunch of other insecurities. But each time I spoke to a group about writing or my journey, again my confidence grew.
It’s okay to have fears. We all have them. But you have to battle them. Fear, I have learned, does not come from God. It is a tool of the evil one. Don’t let him win. Don’t let your fears get the best of you. Stand up to those fears. Battle them. And you will be the winner.
So what is your fear?
I think we can all relate to this, self doubt thing. I too was very shy. But, then I had to do a couple of solo speaking engagements. Since then I have been much more confident, however I still battle with self doubt and fear occasionally. But, I am getting victory over the spirit of fear through the power of the Lord.
Glad you’re conquering that fear, Jewelsy! And being brave. I’m re-reading that book about Chasing a Lion on a Snowy Day into a Cave…oh boy I butchered that title. It’s all about risk taking.
Blessings,
Leanna